We CAN do hard things… part 2

Last year I posted about being able to do hard things after I spent 6 days walking up the Sierra de Aitana range in Spain - and struggling! This year we were back again on a mountain walking trip; the Accursed Mountain range in the stunning Albanian Alps. This time I was better prepared with more endurance walk training and equipment (borrowed poles from a friend). It was tough with the terrain and the heat and we walked higher and for longer than before but it felt much more do-able even if I was still repeating the ‘I can do hard things’ mantra under my breath on the highest slopes!

The other difference this year was that I have completed the ‘Nature as Co-Facilitator’ course with Lesley Roberts. I don’t just learn in order to work with others, I also learn with the intention of using and experimenting with the principles myself; this was the perfect opportunity to immerse myself in curiosity about what nature and its interface with humans can teach me as a coach and as a person.

As last year, nature, the mountains and walking had things to teach me...

1.     Clear air, walking and mindfulness brings clarity of mind

I started the week with some trepidation about a work event that was due a few weeks after my return. I was wondering whether I had over committed and although I was pretty sure I was overthinking the situation it was still niggling me, playing on the edge of my mind and bringing those uncomfortable butterfly feelings in my stomach. Rather than pushing that worry away (which does not tend to work with me, it just comes back bigger!), I let it linger and come in and out of my mind as I walked. I didn’t judge the thoughts, didn’t try to rationalise them but instead just noticed they were there. As I walked higher and higher, and for longer periods, breathing deeply and needing to be fully present so I didn’t trip, those niggly thoughts became less and less important as I let my mind unravel the thoughts in peace. The uncomfortable feelings left me and by the end of the week, I stopped overthinking and instead had a different perspective on how to handle the situation.

Although I cannot walk up a mountain every time I have a concern (thankfully), I do know that walking and fresh air helps my head settle or helps me to come up with solutions without trying too hard. I have always thought of this as the post scripted nature of my life; those gems and insights that come to me when I’m walking my dog around country lanes or wandering along the beach. How can you use the nature on your doorstep to clear your head and find peace?

2.     We can do hard things...but it’s also okay to choose not to.

On the second day, we had walked relentlessly upwards on rocky slopes for about two and a half hours in 28 degree heat reaching our planned destination of a shepherd’s hut on a beautiful plain looking out at the valley surrounded by the mountains. From here we were going to walk back down after a picnic lunch. However, there was an option to continue walking upwards for another 90 minutes to see an even more spectacular view.

Most of the group wanted to do this but a couple of us were not so sure. It was very hot, we had reached our goal, we were tired and it was only day 2! I didn’t want to over tire my legs or even injure myself right at the beginning of the week. However, under some gentle peer pressure and a bit of FOMO, we both said we would go. Yet within a couple of steps, I knew without a doubt that I did not want to continue; my body and mind in unison of saying no. Instead of powering on and ignoring my very loud inner voice, I stopped and said I was happy with where I was and would wait for them to return. Another of the group also said she felt the same so we spent a happy couple of hours in the shade with a book, cold drinks and chatting to other travellers before joining our group on the way down with fresh legs. No prizes for guessing who felt better the next morning before a very long walk...

I can and regularly do push myself out of my comfort zone but sometimes I just have to say... ‘not today’ and be okay with that. Both of those decisions are okay as long as we are making them for our own right reasons.

3.     Look down, look up, look all around

When you’re walking with others, it’s often easy to fall into conversation which is lovely but it also means you might miss something very significant. Our gentle mountain expert guide would be either ahead or amongst us on the trail and at certain points would say:

·      Look down: at the well defined paw print of a brown bear in the soil closely followed by a cranberry infused pile of bear poo – reminding us to be aware of where we were and that we were sharing the route with others

·      Look up: at the awe inspiring golden eagles reminding us of how small we are

·      Look all around you: when we sat on the top of a mountain eating our sandwiches sitting in Albania but with one foot over the green border with Montenegro and looking over at the mountains of Kosovo reminding us the borders we create are sometimes solid and sometimes fluid

As a coach, when walking with and listening to a client/thinking partner, I am always aware of our surroundings and curious as to how my partner is or isn’t interacting with what is going on around us.  Sometimes we just stop and take the time to look around us. What are they noticing? What are they missing? What is going on for them when their pace increases or when they feel the need to stop? Walking in awe inspiring surroundings whether that is a mountain, park, a beach, woodland, a country lane or just sitting in a garden can help us step off that hamster wheel of hectic life, slow down, clear our heads and remind us to just breathe and appreciate. We have a gift of this life.

And remember we CAN do hard things but we don’t always have to!

Right now, I think I’m returning to walking long distances up gentle hills but don’t be surprised if I end up another mountain next year! The payoffs are worth it...